Thursday, 22 October 2009

• Top 5 Pinball Games

  I'm sure we've all spent a few quarters in a pinball machine in our lives.  Me?  I've spent more than anyone ever should.  I could probably buy every machine on this list with the number of quarters I've used playing pinball in my lifetime.  But some of you may not know where to start.  That's where this handy list comes in!  If ever you see one of these in an arcade, you'll know it's worth the quarters!  I give you the top 5 pinball machines I've ever had the pleasure of playing:
  

  
  5) Tales From the Crypt
  

  
  

  
  

  
  I remember playing this game in the general store of a campground we used to visit every year.  It's been probably close to fifteen years since I've played it, but I remember it being one of the most fun pinball machines I've ever used.  The Cryptkeeper was your guide through the game, and despite his creepiness, he never fell short of having a good quip when you failed.  The ball launcher in the form of a doorknocker-representation of him was a nice touch!  I also remember this game having the loosest match numbers at the end of the game of any pinball machine I've ever used...and that means more free games!
  
  

  4)  The Simpsons
  

  
  

  
  

  
  This machine has eaten far too many of my quarters.  I would say that of all the games on my list, this one is the most unforgiving.  There must be something about the pastel paradise of Springfield under the glass that drives balls to the no zone.  It's not a fantastic pinball game, but, like everything else that has the Simpsons' name on it, people play it no matter how much it sucks.  I think maybe there was a little too much going on under the hood, but that's what makes it so much fun and captures the zaniness of Springfield.
  
  

  3)  Hook
  

  
  

  
  

  
  This game lands itself on the list because it's the easiest pinball machine I've ever played.  I'm no pinball wizard, but even I have trouble losing a ball in this one.  And with scores totaling in the hundreds of millions, it makes even the worst player feel like a big shot!  The skill shot at the beginning is a great touch and keeps me coming back to nail just one more launch.  The fact that it has an instant replay feature which gives you one free ball if you truly suck or have terrible luck on a ball is enough to set it apart from any other game on the market.  The icing on the cake?  Hearing Captain Hook say, "I hate, I hate, I hate Peter Pan!"
  
  

  2)  Fire!
  

  
  

  
  

  
  I know what you're thinking:  A pinball game based on the Chicago Fire?  How on earth does that work?  Quite well, let me tell you!  It's one of the only pinball machines that I've ever been able to figure out, goal-wise.  You're supposed to be putting out the fires and saving the citizens of the city one flick at a time.  There's a rather loud fire bell on the top of this machine that rings every time you hit the multiplier, which multiplies your bonus at the end of a round by how many times you hit it.  That means huge bonuses and free games for people who can keep the ball going.  A great feature of this machine is a certain ramp that captures a ball and tells you a firefighter is trapped.  You're tasked with raising the ladder to the burning building and launching the ball up the ramp, triggering a multi-ball, the joy of pinball enthusiasts everywhere!  It's mayhem; it's loud; it's fun; it's Fire!
  
  

  1)  Taxi
  

  
  

  
  

  
  We've come to the top of my list, the cream of the crop, the best damn pinball game there is, in my humble opinion.  Doubtful?  Let me tell you this, then:  Nowhere else can you find Mikhail Gorbachev, Marilyn Monroe, Santa Claus, Dracula, and Pinbot in one place!  In one taxi, no less!  They're your targets in this madcap game with a sense of humor, and y'all know how I love a game with a sense of humor.  Your bonus at the end of every ball depends on how many of them you can cram into your taxi without losing.  Fill it full and take a joyride, and the points shoot through the roof!  Each character has their own voice and will call out when you're close to picking them up, and each shot gives you points depending on how many times you can "spin out" in the ramp off the main shoot.  It's a riot, and I've spent enough money in this thing to buy the machine!
  
  So there you have it, my list for the top 5 pinball machines of all time.  Have you played any of these?  What would you put on the list?
  
  

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